She is the madam who orders the kind of NFL 17 Coins fish her husband likes to have. She puts honey and lemon in her tea, serves it like that when guests come to her house. Other women her age, other women with the same interests she has, who have the same number of children that she has. She does not have to put her coat on, her scarf, and her hat and open the door and walk out into the world a leper, yes, I say a leper because she is rejected wherever she goes. She is the Outsider, the loner, isolated. Nowhere is there a paradise for her. There are norms and values.
What are the norms and values of a single woman (note I did not say the single 'lady')? A single woman is a burden to her family if she is unemployed. If she does not have any skills and her loveliness fades away swiftly. Nobody wants to have anything to do with her. They do not want to talk to her, converse with her because she does not have any talents. If she had they've already convinced themselves of this fact that she would've been married long ago, off their hands.
She will never find herself in a field of love. Instead she will imagine what it would be like. She would imagine the atomic illusion of it. And she will know deep in her heart that she will be a girl for the rest of her life, a being who will never be swept off her feet by a masculine swagger. She would never understand what the words 'flirt', 'flirting' meant. She would remain detached from the world her cousins now inhabit, tangled in obsession. Men like to eat meat and she will remember meals she had with a man once or twice.
How he licked the fat off his lips and drank his wine and how kind he was to her like her father was and when she thought of that she would always think of Dominica. Is there anything else you would like, maybe a dessert, something sweet, a treat to end our meeting like this? You know it's not always going to be this way. I want you to remember me like this always, and that we were happy and friendly and our parting was amicable. Let us part as friends.
Smile, I know you can. I have a present for you. It isn't wrapped though, forgive me. I painted it myself. It's a landscape. It's pretty isn't it? I'm thinking of buying a house there. You've never been to the country before have you. It's beautiful and quiet. Business is business but you have to live somewhere too, you know. You have to live. But I didn't know. I didn't know how to live, how to ask, 'Are you happy now? ' All I seemed to say over and over again was, 'Are you happy now, Jean? Is this what you wanted, or was it a manifesto of loneliness and despair that I had been searching for NFL 17 Ultimate Team Coins all of my life since childhood? '
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